Finding Growth and Meaning When You Have Mom Burnout
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Since I became a mother, I have struggled with finding myself. Being a stay-at-home mom can be demanding, overwhelming, and sometimes boring. I am not ashamed to say that I have wondered why I don’t feel completely at peace being home with my kids. Finding a connection to yourself can be hard when cleaning, cooking, and just trying to raise good humans.
As mothers, we often put ourselves on the back burner and are almost told this is the right thing to do by others. Burnout can cause us to become lonely, isolated, and depressed. Sometimes, shifting our focus or how we look at things can help. Even carving out little moments can feed our sense of self. I want more than to be a mom; even though I love it, I need to know myself.
So join me now, and let’s explore some ways to create a sense of self, find contentment within the mundane, and imagine who we can be because we were someone before we were just branded mothers.
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What is mom burnout?
Raising children can cause mental, emotional, and physical exhaustion. It is not a way of life for the faint of heart. Children require time, love, and energy to become capable members of society. Here are some signs that you are experiencing burnout:
- Feeling overwhelmed and depressed
- Feeling isolated and lonely
- Losing patience with your kids and partner easily
- Feeling tired all the time
- Not having much interest in activities you once loved
- Not enjoying time with family
- Feeling like you are lost, purposeless, or unfulfilled
- Frequent headaches, sleeplessness, and touched out.
- Feelings of resentment and restlessness
Why is facing mom burnout important?
When we finally realize we are burned out, we can begin to address it. Of course, this feeling can ebb and flow, but we need to know how to face it when it comes up.
If we ignore our feelings, they can make everything worse and eventually break us down. We need to find outlets, support, and time to work on ourselves and become something more. We can use our spirituality and therapy, and with a little creativity, we can bring self-care and self-discovery back into our lives.
How to get started with combating burnout
The first step is always admitting this is happening to you and looking for a way to fix it! I hope the little wisdom I can offer will help other mothers see that we can be so much more.
Every day, I struggle to find myself among the piles of laundry, crazy schedules, finding something my kids will eat, and wondering if I will ever have time for myself. I often feel guilty and do not do enough for my family.
It is never the truth. If you feel this way, you are not a bad parent, quite the opposite. You are most likely killing it, and your children love you, but it can be hard to see that when you feel tired and depressed.
Tips for success in finding yourself:
These are all things I have tried or think are worth implementing. Everyone is different, so this is not a one-size-fits-all thing; it is merely suggestions that I hope can help, no matter how small. Remember, you are amazing; there is always a way to improve it with little work.

Find a support system.
In Western society, we have lost that sense of community. Mothers are very much on their own, so we need to make it known that we are struggling and want help. I know personally how hard it is to say that I need help.
- Find a therapist to work through your feelings with. It seems easier and yet harder than ever to find a therapist. There are many online options to try now, which makes things more convenient for a mom.
- Tell a trusted family member you need help, whether around-the-house help, a babysitter, or even someone to vent to.
- Find support groups for stay-at-home moms. Try local groups, maybe within your church if you attend, or even online support groups for greater ease.
- Lean on your partner for support! Make sure you have date nights, play games, or even vent to them. My husband has always been my biggest support in times of burnout!

Find a new hobby.
I know that when you are anxious or depressed, it can be hard to do things for yourself, but one of the best things you can do is find a hobby that you can fall into. Having a hobby can help you decompress, be meditative, and let go for a while. Hobbies are a great way to find yourself! Check out my blog post about hobbies for burnout here!
Here are just a few ideas:
- paint/draw/coloring books
- knit/crochet
- cross stitch/embroidery
- scrapbooking
- journaling
- gaming/puzzles

Delve into your spirituality.
Belief and faith are very powerful things. Delving into your spiritual or religious side can be a great comfort and source of contentment in times of burnout. Prayer and rituals help connect us to something higher than ourselves and show us who we are. I practice my brand of eclectic spirituality, which is a source of comfort.
This will look different for everyone, but here are a few open-ended ideas:
- Pray/ask for guidance/worship whatever lights you up.
- Join groups online or in-person to practice your faith or spirituality.
- Practice yoga/dive into self-exploration/meditate.
- Perform rituals/ceremonies that speak to your inner being.

Practice gratefulness
I know it can be hard to find what to be thankful for when we are down and out, but changing how you look at things is a small thing that can add up and change your views on life over time. This is a wonderful thing to do in the morning when you wake up or at night before you go to bed.
A few suggestions:
- Buy a guided gratitude journal
- Find an app for writing down what you are grateful for.
- Sit and remind yourself of all the blessings in your life. I do this often, and it puts things into perspective.
ex.: I am grateful for being alive, for my children, for a roof over my head, etc.

Block out time for yourself.
I know it seems like there is no “you time” in your day. I often feel like I have to give everything to the house, kids, and husband first, and I always sacrifice myself. It’s not enough to hide in the bathroom with a bag of chocolate. You need to block out time, even if it is only 10 minutes, and do something you want to do, the house and kids, and wait. Even if you stop to listen to your breathing, do it!

Let go of perfectionism.
Nothing in life is perfect, and neither are you! That is reality, and it really is okay. Your kids also need to see that this is okay. They need to see you as human, not superwoman.
Perfectionism breeds discontent and depression. You can’t be and shouldn’t be on all the time. Make mistakes, let things go, and know that in the end, you will not wish you had always been the perfect mom. Your kids will think you are amazing no matter what.

Take care of your physical health.
This may seem like a no-brainer, but physical health can be even harder when little kids run around as you try to do downward dog. Exercise is so important to your mental health; there are so many ways to do it that there is something for every mom out there. Take a class somewhere to connect with others and get a break, too!
Here is a reminder:
- Yoga & meditation for staying grounded and flexible.
- Cardio for your heart.
- Long walks improve your mood and help you think creatively.
- Limiting sugars and processed foods.
- Stay hydrated.
Frequently Asked Questions

The last thing you need to know about mom burnout
Mom burnout is a very real thing that needs to be recognized and addressed in our society, but until then, we must first learn to have compassion and awareness of ourselves.
Mothers are often undervalued and overworked, but if we stop and remember we are people, too, we can let go of pride and realize that we are enough as we are. We are mothers, after all, and that is an amazing thing to bring life into the world.
Remember to honor yourself, take breaks, let go, and be the creative soul you are meant to be. We are not just mothers but people with feelings, dreams, and ambitions.
How have you coped with mom burnout? Let me know in the comments below.
Stay cozy & be a badass mother!